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Submitted on
August 21, 2012
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What soft dreams we lay -
What soft dreams, like infants put to rest -
Frightfully bare, and compromised,
Our kisses on their breasts.

We close our eyes and trust them safe,
Kept 'til break of dawn -
Forgetting that the night is fickle,
And dutifully, as long -

It safeguards some,
Covets others,
Moved by neither coin nor threat
Nor anguished mother's cry.
This came to me quite suddenly this evening. I hope you enjoy it!
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Daily Deviation

Given 2012-11-19
What Soft Dreams by *timeraider Gentle, Lullaby -like simplicity all rolled into this short poem. ( Featured by Beccalicious )
:iconshakrain:
Wow, am I the only one who thought this was incredibly dark? Made more horrifying by the sweet-and-cute tone, like that cursed song about the baby in the treetop. It's delightful, I love it!
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:icontimeraider:
timeraider Dec 8, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I certainly hope you were not alone in thinking that. I enjoyed your comments - thank you so much for stopping by and reading.
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:iconunderthewildmoon:
I'm glad you got a daily for this.

This poem has a quiet melody to it that inspires the sound of a music box in my ears. It exists, when I read it, like a memory from infancy. This piece is passionate, innocent, bright and dark all at once.

I always remark on how your style intrigues me, and I'll say it again today: your fixed form work is lovely, beautiful, something I was never good at writing. Lovely to see and a pleasure to read.
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:icontimeraider:
timeraider Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! Both for reading and for posting these lovely remarks.
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:iconsynmor:
I love this poem, I find it so eerily sad because I can relate on the level of dreams that slip away in the night, and also at once on the level of the child, the new hope, that dies in the night.
The rhythm is haunting and soft, like a lullaby, and your word choice follows suit with the trend. Definite favorite. Beautiful.
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:icontimeraider:
timeraider Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Those are lovely comments. Thank you so much.
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:iconshadowsinthemoonlite:
shadowsinthemoonlite Nov 19, 2012  Professional Writer
Amazing...
I love writing. Words are my life and love, and honestly, your words touched my heart. I've read many a well written poem in my day, but yours really takes the literature cake by far. It's beautiful, and it even brought a tear to my eye. Needless to say, I favortied this. :) It's absolutely amazing.
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:icontimeraider:
timeraider Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for reading! And for the wonderful feedback. I am happy to hear my poem affected you.
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:iconarandommoon:
ArandomMoon Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Wow...I couldn't help but think that it's related to a mother and her baby. when you described dreams like a baby and when I got to the last line about the anguished mother's cry, I thought it's like the mom lost her baby in some way through the night. Gosh, the firat stanza was like a lullaby and then the dream turned into a nightmare. BEAUTIFUL!
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:icontimeraider:
timeraider Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for reading, and for the wonderful feedback!
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